Hadley, besides being naturally beautiful, was up for anything I threw at her during our photo shoot. The very first “pose” of our morning involved running into a gaggle of geese at the park and it was absolutely hilarious. Hadley braved the [somewhat nasty] geese for my camera and thus began our time together. While the bird shots didn’t turn out in the end, my computer is now loaded with great images of the gorgeous and very lovely Hadley.

Thanks, Hadley, for the fun photo shoot! I hope your senior year is awesome.

You: Hi there, Rebecca! Whatcha doing today?
RT: Oh, just recording some blood sugars, carbs from breakfast/lunch/dinner and how much insulin I gave for each meal.
You: Sounds like fun!
RT: Oh boy, is it!

You: Hey! What are you reading there, Rebecca?
RT: Oh, hi. I’m reading up on the latest continuous glucose monitoring systems and doing internet research to determine which one might be best for me.
You: That sounds like fun! Wish I could do that, too!
RT: Doesn’t it?!

You: Hey, Tredway! What are your plans this week? Want to get coffee?
RT: Howdy. Sorry, no coffee for me. I have exciting plans to call my insurance company and see what kind of coverage they’ll offer me for great diabetes care! And after that, get this, I’m going to make appointments for eye exams and dental care. Woohoo!

Type 1 diabetes has been a constant companion since I was 16 years old. I’ve had years of ups and downs. Ironically perhaps, I cared more for myself when I was first diagnosed as a teenager. I’ve gotten really lazy, really bitter and really annoyed by diabetes in the past ten years or so. I’ve done enough just to get by, but it’s not enough to make the future look bright.

My new slogan is: Diabetes is my hobby.

Like any new challenge, I am going to give my attention to diabetes for awhile, at least long enough to ascertain patterns and carb counts and how much insulin is needed and when. And while those conversations above will never really happen, I need to work hard on caring for myself. It’s going to take time. It’s going to take encouragement. It’s going to take perseverance. But, if I can focus on what really matters, it’ll make all the difference in the longrun.

Chicken-apple sausage, corn on the cob, green salad and garlic bread. This might just be the perfect dinner to eat in Nebraska in August. Mmmm. We paired it, not with a fine wine, but with Ponyo, which is a totally delightful family film.

Two weeks ago: Is it kindergarten yet???!!!! [bounces around the house with glee]

Tuesday night: Tomorrow I start kindergarten!!!!! [bouncing, glee, etc]

Wednesday 7:02am: It’s kindergarten today!!! [a little less bounce because it’s early in the morning, lots of glee]

Wednesday, 7:47am: Backpack, sidewalk notes, lunch!!! [big smiles]

Wednesday, 8:04am: [The tide turns. Emotions on edge, finally spill over into tears.]
But I want to take my dollies to school! Waaaaah!!

Wednesday, 8:12am: I want to go home. I want to go home. [said in a whisper while clinging to mommy’s leg amongst the millions of schoolchildren and their parents]

Wednesday, 8:13am: Mommy is forced to be strong while blinking back tears of her own.

Wednesday, 8:15am: Child is safely and peacefully walked into classroom. Mommy holds Daddy’s arm and attempts to be brave.

Wednesday, 8:47am: Mommy thinks school is a *brilliant* idea, marvels over the fact that it’ll go on, day after day, until May.

Wednesday, 1:55pm: School was GREAT! My teacher is so kind; she’s not a yeller! [And the giddy chattering commences until bedtime. Seriously, she couldn’t stop talking she was so excited.]

This wasn’t *the* moment before school as it took place immediately after breakfast when Livia slung on the backpack and checked out a dead moth on the front porch. Hair unbrushed, teeth unbrushed and shoeless, but my kid is excited to start school!

We stepped outside to sweet notes on the front and back walks. Who was our Mystery Encourager? Renae! Reneighbor! Love love love it.

A peek in her lunch reveals a napkin and a note from Mommy. I hope she likes the heart.

My friend Joanna runs Ministry of Reality Mondays on her blog, In Search of Lost Time. Another friend, Moriah, as noted in the comments section, runs Fun Mom Fridays. Both are great blogging ideas and I want to feature them here. As it happened, I recently ran a fun idea in the middle of the week and now a moment of reality on a Tuesday. BUT… if I ever do it on the right day, friends, I’ll let you know!

This photo shows my own Moment of Reality after Livia and I went to the zoo on one of the most humid days this month. I felt like a great mom that day: I bought food for the goats! I bought train tickets! I was taking my kid to the zoo on a Saturday even though I hate Saturdays at the zoo! I’m not sure Liv valued my efforts as much as I did, however. She was hot, and sweaty, and tired. So, right outside the zoo gates, she sat down on a bench in the shade and I could. not. move. her. Here it was, a thousand degrees out and my car, my Bastion of Air Conditioning, a mere 50 feet away, and my child quit moving entirely.

My friends, I did not perform well in that moment. I scolded and threatened and eventually moved her bodily onto the sidewalk once more. Inside I was getting more and more worked up. (Let’s just say I can understand the emotions that led to Steven Slater’s dramatic plane exit recently.) My hand propelled her towards the car door and then, get this, she walked away from the car and stubbornly stood in the shade of a nearby tree.

Public setting. Child with an internal tantrum. Mother about to lose it with an external tantrum. Images of myself on the six o’clock news flash before my eyes.

So, with an eye on my daughter, I got into the car, cranked up the A/C, and yelled something like, “Get in the freaking car!” I paused, looked around the car, wondered how to proceed and… picked up my camera. I’ve taken photos for many, many reasons, but this was the first time I snapped a few shots in order to calm myself down. And for the most part, it worked.

I can’t remember when Livia got in the car. I can remember hollering a lecture and issuing discipline at home. I recall the sweetness of air conditioning and how grateful I was to live in a time where air conditioning is possible. I also recall apologies all around, from mama and child alike. Thank God for grace, and photographic evidence.

I plan to pull out this picture when Liv has a rough moment with a stubborn child someday. : )

Waking.
Shooting a senior (in the best way possible) while
Finding adventures along the way.
Reveling in the beautiful weather.
Snapping my shutter over and over.
Downloading.
Editing.
Editing.
Fixing lunch.
Editing.
Drinking (only a diet soda, but a margarita would’ve been nice).
Editing.
Editing.
Backing up the computer.
Blogging.
Looking forward to a Sunday nap and
Worshipping Jesus tonight at Redeemer.

Summer has dwindled into the hot, humid days of August where some of us mommies begin to say, Now, when does school start? The structure and enthusiasm of earlier weeks has turned into something less shapely, where too much television might be consumed and motherly motivation is lacking.

It was on one of these lazy, hazy days that Livia and I emerged from our pseudo-naptimes (Quiet Time in our house) and simply had to find adventure. Here I was, reading all the Facebook statuses about friends being in cool Colorado, and it was high time to entertain myself in the city of Lincoln, Nebraska, instead of merely being envious.

So we wandered through Indigo Bridge Books, picked up the best ice cream in town at Ivanna Cone, and wandered among the trains for a time. Deciding the wandering should be extended, we quickly drove out to Pioneers Park and pet turtles and snakes at the Nature Center. Livia caught—and released—a toad and a moth. I snapped photos and filled up the creative space in my own heart.