Wow. I’ve been reading this book on pain (The Gift of Pain, Dr. Paul Brand & Philip Yancey), and over and over it has impressed me. I find myself repeatedly bookmarking my page then immediately sharing what I’ve read with Jeremy or I’ll lay in bed at night and consider the amazing way God has created our bodies. It’s all I can do to complete the book before doing Internet research on the chief author, Dr. Brand, and his lifelong work with leprosy patients.

Currently I’m halfway through the book and I can’t wait any longer to share some of this fascinating knowledge in Blogland. The following paragraphs reveal why Brand’s discourse on pain is so very interesting:

It took many years of research to put together a full picture, but at last I understood. Pain employs a wide tonal range of conversation. It whispers to us in the early stages: at a subconscious level we sense a slight discomfort and change position in bed, or adjust a jogging stride. It speaks louder as danger increases: a hand grows tender after a long stint at ranking leaves, or a foot grows sore in new shoes. And pain shouts when the danger becomes severe: it forces a person to limp or even to hop or else quit running altogether…

Once, back at the leprosarium, I had an abrupt encounter with a loud “shout” of pain. I was walking along the sidewalk with my eyes lifted high, searching the treetops for the source of a lovely birdsong, when crash, the next thing I knew I was lying face down on the path. I felt an instant flush of embarrassment and looked around quickly to see if anyone had seen me fall. I felt irritated, even angry. But then, as I rose to my feet and checked myself for injuries, I realized what had happened. As my eyes gazed upward toward the bird, my foot had wandered over to the edge of the sidewalk. I was in the process of putting all my weight on the foot, which hung precipitously over the concrete edge. My ankle began to twist until the tiny collateral ligament of the angle sensed itself being stretched to the breaking point. Without consulting me, that little ligament set in motion a powerful pain message that forced the immediate slackening of the major muscles of my thigh. In the more peremptory fashion, that action deprived the knee of its muscular support and it collapsed. In short, I fell…

Without this chorus of pain, a leprosy patient lives in constant peril. He will wear too-tight shoes all day. He will walk five, ten, fifteen miles without changing gait or shifting weight. And, as I had seen so often in India, even if sores break open inside his shoe, he will not limp… He [lacks] the indispensable protection of pain.

**Sarah B, I don’t know if you have internet access anymore, but I hope you get a chance to read this book. You, of all people, will understand why I find it so intriguing. Three cheers for A&P in high school. ; ) By the way, I miss you! xoxoxo

Thanks, Michelle, for tagging me. My rarely-updated blog appreciates it!

10 years ago: I was enjoying my best and worst year of high school. I was performing as Olivia Seraphim Light in Chris Cartmill’s Laws or The Light Before Darkness at school. My choir was a part of a huge community endeavor. While learning to sing The Creation by Haydn, we were fundraising for a spring trip to sing in Lincoln Center in New York City along with hundreds of other college and high school students. Like many other overachieving high school students, I was getting worn down with all the activity. Unlike most other 17 year olds, however, my islet cells were failing and within two months I would be diagnosed with type 1 diabetes and begin taking life-giving insulin. What a year!

5 years ago: Jeremy and I had just moved into a shotgun apartment across the street from the beautiful Missouri Botanical Garden in St. Louis. Though I was sometimes dreaming of quitting school in order to become a pastry chef, I continued to prepare for my senior year of college which included one semester of student teaching. Two of my closest friends from Covenant College had moved to St. Louis for the year, so I finally had coffeehouse friends nearby and didn’t have to work so hard at getting to know people anymore.

1 year ago: Apparently I was renting movies from Blockbuster and
cuddling with my darling four month old baby.

Yesterday: I was both busy relaxing (hm, can you be busily relaxing?!) with Jeremy and Livia, and celebrating Jeremy’s 35th birthday and Andrew’s 24th birthday. Happy birthday, boys!! The best part of the day included a lovely dinner at The Oven with the Tredway clan. Nothing beats naan, curry and cheesecake.

5 snacks I enjoy: Tortilla chips and cheese/bean dip, apples with cheese slices, chocolate bars with toffee bits, sweetened dry cereal (like Fruit Loops), and Wheat Thins.

5 songs I know all of the words to: All For Jesus, The Isty Bitsy Spider, many songs from Les Miserables, April Is In My Mistress’ Face (a madrigal), Jesus Loves Me

5 things I’d do with 100 million dollars: Pay off the student loans of my siblings (including the honorary Lawton named Charity), put money away for the educations of future Lawton grandbabies, give a sizable chunk to my home church, buy a second vehicle, TRAVEL THE WORLD.

5 places I’d run away to: Carmel, California; coastal Italy; France; Hawaii; anywhere my husband is.

5 things I’d never wear: Halter tops, gold caps on my front teeth, miniskirts; sneakers with long skirts, shoulder pads.

5 favorite TV shows: The Amazing Race, Firefly, Buffy, Angel, Survivor.

5 biggest joys: Being desired by God; being desired by my husband; watching my daughter grow; smelling salty sea air and hearing waves crash upon a shore; creating something lovely — a kind greeting card, a completed piece of writing, a framed photograph.

5 favorite toys: Does Livia count?; high speed internet access; our iMac; my new oven and my fairly new washer and dryer (to appreciate the new, you have to experience the old). [Update 9/26: Duh, my camera is probably my favorite toy. Another one that isn’t very toy-like, but that I do love, is our paper-cutter.]

5 people I want to pass this on to: Charity, Andy, Renae, Jason, Karen (aka: The Newlyweds of Summer 2005).

This admission cracks me up… I can totally identify (says the girl who dances to music from opening credits of tv shows, commericals, and various radio programs and always hopes the neighbors don’t happen to be watching and laughing hysterically).

Not your shiny bike or walker.
Not your expensive Leapfrog toys.
Not the myriad stuffed animals you own.

What are the most fun things to play with when you’re 16 months old?

Folded laundry representing hours of Mommy’s work.
Daddy’s big clunky shoes and Mommy’s sandals.
Any minute piece of lint, plastic or dirt on the living room rug.
Neatly organized and boxed MTG cards.
Magazine racks.
DVD, VCR and stereo buttons.
And finally, horror of horrors, the kitchen trashcan.

Hmmm… And she’s not even walking yet. : /

God of nature, at whose voice the waves and winds must now obey,
Give your people words of comfort, acts of grace to share today.
Yours the pow’r of devastation, yours to gather, help and heal;
We know not your ways of wisdom; let your light our paths reveal.

Shelter Lord, the homeless, helpless, young and old with pity see,
Give their daily food, supply their needs with perfect equity.
Grant protection, strength and patience to their rescuers, we pray;
Fill with hope the laboring workers, grace to serve both night and day.

Bring your people ever closer, sharing pain of grief and loss,
Motivate us, loving Savior, with the love shown by your cross.
We, your Body, long to serve you, serving others in your name,
And when sorrow washes o’er us, Gracious Spirit, heal the pain.

Call our nation to repentance; gather us to finally see
You’re the God of love and mercy; rescue us and set us free.
Let our deeds announce redemption, saving grace for all our days.
Let your song go forth to cheer us, lifting heart and hands to praise. Amen.

Beach Spring, 87.87.D (Come All Christians Be Committed)
Nettleton, 87.87.D (Come Thou Fount)

© 2005 Stephen D. Lawton, all rights reserved.
Permission is hereby granted for credited use, unaltered, only in public worship.

Offered in response to Hurricane Katrina and the ensuing disasters in the gulf coast states, August 29, 2005. Mr. Lawton is Director of Music and Worship, Mitchell Road Presbyterian Church, Greenville, SC. (PCA)
______________________________________

**My Uncle Steve emailed me the hymn he penned and I do believe it’s being sung all over the United States now. Yesterday we sang it at Zion — it was a pleasant suprise to me. Uncle Steve wasn’t so much touted as “The Director of Music and Worship at Mitchell Road” as he was for being “David Lawton’s brother.” ; )

…that bandaids are discriminatory? (There is a little tongue-in-cheek involved in this post, by the way, so nobody get crazy with the comments.)

I never once thought about this notion until Buffy fixed Principal Wood’s forehead cut on Season 7 of Buffy. The peach-toned bandaid looked like The Shining Beacon of Boo-boo’s on Wood’s dark skin (very handsome dark skin, I might add). Most of us want to minimize our owies with bandaids, not maximize them or draw attention to them. Funny, I never thought of bandaids like this before. Apparently, others have.

I’m experiencing major brain-freeze when it comes to blogging these days. As always, there is plenty to write about, but I’m feeling more than a bit sluggish about actually writing. My apologies to you who run a blog roll each day and are bored at the sight of the Prairie Box… I’ll try harder, I promise.

Random Thoughts:
Baby clothes are kind of expensive. And I’m not even sure what size my daughter will be wearing this fall. She is quite tall and quite slender; sometimes 12 month shorts fall off her teeny waist. Hmmm…

I made my first eBay purchase the other day under my tutor’s experienced guidance (Jeremy knows the in’s and out’s). MAC lipstick in Lame. Girls, I am telling you, MAC is the best of the best, the cream of the crop. Long-lasting, perfect color. Glosses or lipsticks, take your pick. (Man, they should pay me for this recommendation!)

When you’ve given your life to God, things don’t really get stagnant. Sometimes I think my spiritual life is ho hum – but this is only due to my lack of prayer. When I ask for insight, boy, do I get it. Right now the depth of my pride, or perhaps the sheer height of it, is blowing me away. I’m in need of all sorts of grace.

Another thing I’m learning about is that my discontent (of life) is sin, plain and simple. I tend to be a “grass is greener” kind of girl, falsely believing that the life I don’t have is better than what God’s given me. When I was in school I couldn’t wait to be a stay-at-home mom. And now that I’m at home, I find myself thinking about taking classes or working – and how these things may make my life more fulfilling. I’m slowly learning to cover my ears, ignore these lies, and thank the Lord for the ability to be fully at home right now.

Okay, enough of the heavy stuff… Our garden’s not looking so good. Between a small hailstorm and late planting, I think it’s almost done for.

Anaheim peppers, at least the ones in our garden, are H-O-T. Note to self: next time you make teriyaki skewers, make sure to remove the seeds from the peppers. And then after you sample a terrifically hot piece of pepper, make sure not to rub your eyes. And if you do rub your eyes, make sure to have some Visine on hand.

I want to write about the devastation in Louisiana and Mississippi. And yet I don’t want to as well. So much death and destruction, so much heartache and loss. We continue to pray…

I feel like I should mark this moment in history by making some comment on Hurricane Katrina. But honestly, I’m not sure what to say.

May God’s mercy reach down and rescue the helpless today. Amen.

This song gets to me every time I hear Johnny Cash sing it (American IV: The Man Comes Around). Lyrics by Roberta Flack.

The first time ever I saw your face
I thought the sun rose in your eyes
And the moon and stars were the gift you gave
To the dark and empty skies, my love,
To the dark and empty skies.

The first time ever I kissed your mouth,
I felt the earth move in my hand,
Like a trembling heart of a captive bird
That was there at my command, my love,
That was there at my command.

The first time ever I lay with you
And felt your heart beat close to mine
I thought our joy would fill the earth
And last til the end of time, my love,
And last till the end of time

(Wait, don’t answer that!)

Exerpted from a credit card offer in today’s mail:

It’s easier than you think to earn your valuable reward. Simply use your card to make purchases totalling $1,300 or more each month from September 1 through October 31, 2005. Once you do, you’ll earn a $100 [Nice Hotel Chain] Bonus Bucks Coupon which you can use at most [Nice Hotel Chain] hotel brands. Pay for your stay, enjoy a facial at a luxurious spa or dine with your colleagues. So, start using your card and earn towards your $100 [Nice Hotel Chain] Bonus Bucks Coupon today.

What a joke! Spend $1,300 in order to receive a coupon I may or may not use at some hotel? It’s madness I tell you…

The other credit card info in today’s mail was legit. At first I had a bit of trouble activating our new cards on the credit company’s computerized telephone line. For some reason I ended up deep in Spanish dialogue, way over my head considering my fading Spanish 4 skills from high school. The second time around I dialed a completely different company’s phone number. Finally, on the third call, things went well… Over my speakerphone, when the computerized voice said “Press 1 or say 1 for English,” Livia loudly pronounced something serious in Baby Babble. Whatever she said did the trick and within moments our cards were activated. What would I do without that kid?