On the evening of Thanksgiving I found three chefs buzzing about my kitchen, two dudes talking around the table, and—where was my child?—probably two little people watching Phineas & Ferb. A few minutes later my parents showed up and we ate some crazy good tacos for dinner. Our Lawton Thanksgiving meal was held on Friday instead and that evening started my hosting duties.
I love to host. I love having the party right there in my house. Sharing our home with friends and family, letting them make me dinner (not a required thing, but those yummy tacos were not made by me!), getting up in the morning knowing the fun continues; I really enjoy it all.
So now I have a question for you all: What do you appreciate when you are being hosted in someone’s home? What special touches make you feel comfortable? What kind of attitudes are helpful when you are a guest? What should a host do? And what should a host avoid? I welcome your thoughts!
16 Comments
Rebecca Nov 24, 2012 11:23 AM
I keep thinking of how fun it was to stay at Charity & Andy’s house. Charity makes a great guest basket full of little things you just might need while there. She had magazines I’d like and a bottle of water—and for me, the girl with diabetes, juice boxes in case I needed them. :)
Sarah M Nov 24, 2012 11:34 AM
ha! it’s me ;)
The thing that I can’t stand (and try to overcompensate for when I host) is a house that is not ‘playable’ for small kids. Perhaps it’s because recently we’ve been to many of these houses (owners scolding kids, me being so cautious with them that it’s stressful to even go), that I feel that way, but if there’s something that one would be upset if it broke, put it away if there are small children making an appearance. I’d seriously rather not go then be hyper-vigilant with my kids.
Rant aside (!), I just love going to people’s homes who are down to earth and informal–enough to even ask the guests to help if need be and the atmosphere is calm. A candle burning always seems homey, too! :)
Rebecca Nov 24, 2012 11:39 AM
Candle burning up high so little fingers don’t touch it? ;)
Jenni Nov 24, 2012 11:43 AM
I always love water and small snacks in my room, coffee always available and the wireless code written on a piece if paper in the room so I don’t have to ask;).
Sarah M Nov 24, 2012 11:44 AM
haha, right, and I totally don’t mean not to teach kids to be gentle, don’t touch, etc….but when you have 4-5 small open shelves of glasswares and breakables…it’s just too much
S
A Musing Maralee Nov 24, 2012 11:53 AM
Make breakfast flexible! I don’t want to feel like I’m holding up someone’s meal plans if I’m not up and ready at the appropriate time or inconveniencing if I’m up too early. I’d rather have cereal boxes on the table when I’m ready than pancakes to be served at 7:30 sharp.
Rhiannon Nov 24, 2012 12:41 PM
I love to be their center of the universe. Many times a person has another agenda after the event is over or have to do something during the event. It is so nice to not feel rushed out the door and to be able to talk or play games for however long we want. To do lists are endless and our regular lives must go on…but it sure nice to feel like you are the only thing on the to do list or only event in their calendar for the time you are with them.
kate o. Nov 24, 2012 1:26 PM
ooohh, the wireless password written out is brilliant!
i love when there is good music playing and when the host simply relaxes and sits and talks. and wine after kids are down never hurts ;)
Jen Nov 24, 2012 3:29 PM
Relax! Simple meals, flexible schedule. When our kids were little, we spent long weekends in Denver with my sister-in-law and husband. We had the whole basement to ourselves with a bedroom and bathroom. When the little people got up way too early, we could corral them in the basement instead of worrying about them waking up the whole house.
Hope Nov 24, 2012 4:29 PM
Great question and great answers! I love to make my guests feel like they have a clean, cozy place to stay with tasty meals and candles always burning! We do a lot of road tripping staying with a ton of friends I love when they don’t leave me scratching my head as what to eat or where my blankets and towels are:) my one sweet friend when I stayed with her last Christmas had a bath prepared with candles and tea after I put my sick kids to bed. It was awe-some! That’s how I want people to feel relaxed, on autopilot and totally taken care of because I am doing all the work!
Lindsey Nov 24, 2012 9:10 PM
I love it when people leave the wireless password out, and my friend Katie always leaves a shower puff along with the standard guest bath towel when I visit, which is really nice! She buys them in bulk so they’re only about $1/piece. I usually stay with good friends so anyplace that feels like home is a good visit to me! When I have guests, I keep an extra phone charging cord (the kind Target sells with six different charger attachments for nearly every phone) and leave it in the guest room.
At my parents’ house, my mom has a little basket in the bathrooms that my sister and I use, with lotion, the contact solution and cleaner we both use, a razor, a new toothbrush/toothpaste, shampoo, cotton balls, q-tips, face wash … she stows the baskets under the sink and pulls them out when we come home (and we’re always welcome to pilfer the basket and take home something too, heh). It’s great knowing I don’t have to pack the normal toiletries when going to my parents’ house, and even if I do and forget something, it’s probably in the basket! And since we just keep using what’s in there, it’s not like my mom has to replenish the whole basket every time we visit, which would get pricey. They also have blackout shades in the guest bedrooms which is glorious. In the morning, there is usually cereal, fruit, bowls, spoons, OJ in the kitchen so we can help ourselves, and for additional guests there are usually cinnamon rolls left in a heated-but-off oven with a note indicating that on the counter. Then it’s very “eat when you want” like Maralee said. Oh! And my mom also puts the new Cooking Light/InStyle/Good Housekeeping on our nightstands (they’re usually ones she’s already subscribed to, so we read them and leave them, or take the ones she purchased like People–with us!). And somehow Katie’s and my college mini-fridge that sat in the JBU dorms for 8 years is still miraculously working so whoever gets to stay in the basement has access to a stocked fridge with water bottles, a couple Izze drinks, pop etc.
Evidently, this is how my parents get us to come home :)
Renae Nov 25, 2012 8:43 AM
The good news is that it’s possible to be a gracious host, no matter your style. I’ve felt completely comfortable in places where the host was at my beck and call, doing everything for me, and equally comfortable in places where I had my own space and could set my own schedule without bothering the host for every little thing. I would say host like you want to host (not necessarily the same as you like to be hosted; truth be told, I love to be pampered, but I’m more comfortable hosting hands-off). You will be more comfortable hosting if you do what cones more naturally for you, and that in turn will make your guests more comfortable.
Rebecca Nov 25, 2012 9:25 AM
A lot of the fun of hosting overnight guests seems to be anticipating their needs/desires before they ask. I love all the special touches and flourishes you can do, but I also feel very comfortable doing what I can with the knowledge that a bed and a soft pillow is the biggest need of a guest.
Wireless password! Genius idea, Jenni. We’re gonna get on that next time.
One thing I keep thinking of as a must in hosting is cleanliness. (So maybe that bed and pillow is secondary.)
Charity Nov 25, 2012 12:30 PM
:)
Look forward to being your guest!
Bethany Nov 26, 2012 3:02 PM
Yes to the wireless password, and YES to putting away things you don’t want children to handle. There is nothing more stressful than spending an entire weekend telling your kid “don’t touch that!”
Monica Nov 28, 2012 5:38 AM
Love all the ideas here! We have tried to have the p/w written out for when we host college choir ladies for church! :) I feel the most comfortable when I don’t feel like I’m holding up someone else’s plans and things are a bit more relaxed and flexible! So, I try to extend that to our guests – if they want to go in their room and read or need some quiet, I want them to feel at home enough to do that. I guess finding the balance between hosting and relaxing.